The Return of The...Jedi? Nah...

I'm officially not dead.  No more heart attacks either.  Just Grad School happened.  It's on hold now. 

So how has the universe hindered me you say?  Oh, plenty of ways, but I need to write em down first before I put em here.  So I'll leave you with this.

That moment you get something tasty and you're really excited to eat it.  You go to tear it open and the universe says "HELL NAW!"  Like this:

"Easy Open Tear", my ass!

See!  SEE!  I had to go to the kitchen, FIND a pair of scissors (because in this house, basic office supplies wear invisibility cloaks), then cut the damn thing open.  Then I panicked that, in my rage of scissors and paper and gnashing of teeth, I cut the "perfectly resealable" sealing part.  If this happened, they would only be "perfectly popable" which poses a hindrance to my self-control. 

Portion-control challenged or not, I succeeded in not destroying the seal or the bag of Reese's in a single sitting.

Still though:  Me-0
Universe- 1 (we started over, it's a new year)